Not everyone can afford or access the bigger cities, to *hopefully* experience the goth scene in real life. Some of us find ourselves living in fairly intolerant environments, where we may or may not feel isolated and even perhaps a bit of fear from the locals who may not take to us very kindly.

I have found that, I must to some extent "stifle" myself when I'm out and about in my small Vancouver Island town. The reasons for this are two : In Courtenay, BC it's bad enough that I apparently have the audacity to wear all black, let alone add make-up and such to the mix. I also feel like because my body doesn't work properly (due to a medical condition) I shouldn't wear anything I can't "back up" in a fight. I've been trying to work on demolishing this sense of "fear" that I have, but I'd feel more comfortable if I was living in a bigger place.

Not to say big cities are at all any safer . . . but I truly believe that the smaller the town, the small the minds are of the people who live there.

I actually was safer when I lived in Victoria, BC where I went to university for 5 years than my hometown. Sometimes, it's the smaller places that can be the deadliest because there isn't as much for young people to do here than there is in bigger places (where they could occupy themselves a lot better as well as more often). Here in Courtenay, gangs of teenagers prowl the streets at night and hang out at a certain park where even more "grown" adults have been known to be roughed up. My town looks pretty, but has a rather disgusting underside to it that isn't directly visible from the eyes of a tourist.

I'd go out on the weekends, but unless I had 3-4 people with me, I feel like I'd be a walking target for some of the people who live in this area. I'm used to flying solo, and living in more-progressive Victoria allowed me to do this with more ease. I still kept my wits about me and practiced good street smarts, but in Victoria I found I had more freedom than I do now. This is also partly the case because I was by myself and didn't live under my parents' roof. I'll be blunt - I rather not pick myself up off the bar floor because some redneck, small-minded idiot decided he'd deck the "faggot wearing all black." We don't just have rednecks here - we have white kids who think they're all "gangster" too. Same thing would basically happen though.

At the bar I went to in Victoria, everyone was accepted. On Fridays and Saturdays, one could very regularly see a *few* alternative people in general attending. They may not have been necessarily gothic, but they definitely came out to dance and to have fun.

What does everybody think? Any tips on surviving a small town when you're goth? Care to share any experiences?

I spent the last 25 years in a small area with a population of about 500 peoples. It was full of hate, loneliness, and homophobia. It was a beautiful place to live, but the locals... were very small minded.

Tips:
Become anti-social and reclusive.
Don't ride a bike or walk anywhere by yourself, you'll only get feces or bottles thrown at you.
Don't go out after dark, that's when the bars are open. Weekends are a no-no, too.
The internet and library are your best friends.
Know which of the cashier's at the grocery store won't over charge you.
Don't let your pets outside unsupervised.

Sorry, just talking from experience. I don't mean to be negative all the time.

I concur on many of those, especially the one about weekends. In my town, there are *3* high schools. I live about 5 minutes from the one I went to, and it's a ten minute or so drive to another and about the same time frame to get to the third. Saturdays are a time when all the teens come out to play during the day, and all legally able to drink people at night. Both groups also like Fridays too

I'm lucky I have a lot of video games, ebooks, etc at home with me- it might be lonely at times, but clearing levels/areas of enemies in Champions Online is a great time killer.

I live in a small town as well. There is no Goth scene whatsoever... And to be honest, I never socialize with anyone here... I am an introvert who sticks to my books. The only Goth communication I have is sadly over the Internet, but when I am of age I shall move to Germany (I am even learning German!) or the likes, where there is hopefully a bigger Goth scene. I can also go to Wave Gotik Treffen as well...

I'd love to go to that, along with the Whitby goth weekend/event that area puts on each year.

I also would love to attend a couple of the "vampyre" club nights in New York.

Props to you for wanting to learn German. I've been *meaning* to learn the language myself.

That would be lovely. Do you know the minimum age for them, along with Wave Gotik Treffen? I am younger than you may think... (Physical age is irrelevant to me, but nevertheless it is a restriction in modern day life...)
And yes, I love German! Though I know not much yet... I have merely begun!

I wouldn't know. It's something I will *most likely* check into in the near future though

I wish I could go back to UVic (where I went to university) so I could just learn German through the Germanic and Russian Studies Dept.

Yeah. I live in a small village in the north of england and about 35 miles from a small town with a population of about 750. I live near Newcastle as well so chavs are a big problem. I went longboarding with my friend and it started to get dark and the pubs were just opening. A gang of chavs were already drunk and had several empty bottles to hand. We went past on the other side of the road as fast as we could and my friend was hit in the head by a bottle and was mildly concussed. My legs were cut by shards of shattering glass and we both had to go to A+E and were there over night...we never went out after dark again and I am now very scared to go out wering black. There is a big issue with chavs in my school as well and they constantly take the piss because of my tastes. I am just getting into the goth scene and my sister took me to Camden market and now want to live in London. =^.^= the sooner the better!

It's nice to see your mention of the public library being a goth's best friend. Not surprisingly, a lot of librarians are goth. Besides me, we have another librarian posting on this board that I know of.

-- Nephele

Libraries are where all the lore can be found. Sometimes, you really can't beat using the Dewey decimal system to find yourself a great work.

I think that because I'm part of a generation that grew up during the infancy of the internet . . . we've lost touch with how knowledge is usually acquired. A dusty old tome speaks volumes more than Wikipedia in some cases. Especially, if you're researching something rather obscure, like Greek curse tablets or would like to view source material in its original form over someone's online regurgitation.

You never know how much someone could deem in a work, "unnecessary." It's why I don't completely trust online occult grimoires for instance.

-- Sun Dec 11, 2011 1:54 pm --




Since I live in Canada, we don't call 'em chavs.... but I know the kind of person you're talking about. Sadly, a lot of kids these days are becoming more cookie-cutter every day. Of course . . . this is perhaps a symptom of getting older. I'm sure the previous generation(s) could easily write the likes of me off as nothing but a lazy degenerate.

Yer but as long. As you know what I mean. You know, shaved heads and wearing trainers and track suits.(I have always wanted to live in canada.) , I heard you talking about library's. I also find library's a very safe place to be. Because its so quiet i find it a very calming atmosphere. And it's always good just to sit down with a good book for a few hours worth no one to disturb you.

^^What she said.

Also, I live in the suburbs (which can be just as ignorant as small towns) so I get what you're saying. Hmm, are you planning to move anytime soon?

Unless I win the lottery on Christmas Day . . . unfortunately, I'm stuck where I am right now. Even going back to school at the local college is going to have me stuck here a while.

Orlok, be sure to visit us on the mainland sometime, I know Vancouver would love to have you.

I don't intend to steal you away from this board, but for things to do and people to meet with both on the Island and on the mainland, you really ought to check out Gothic BC (http://www.gothic.bc.ca), especially the forums there. You might find some folks that live closer to you that you can breathe a sigh of relief with.

Back on topic, I grew up in a rural area not far from Vancouver, although that was 30 years ago. But even so, no matter how commonplace alternative cultures have become in fashion, music, art, the media, etc. in that time, a negative mentality still remains with some who simply fear what they don't understand. Even though I live in the big city now, I still see ghosts of it. To this day, on occasion I *still* get shadowed in department stores (as if wearing black = shoplifter), and catch people quickly looking away in pubs and restaurants. My heart goes out to you, I remember *exactly* what it was like.

I've never been to the mid/north end of the island. I am rather surprised to find your experience there is less then Grand... Granted most people I know from the island are from the south end, but they've pretty much all been artists, hippies, surfers or otherwise "alternative people". I know several from the greater Victoria area that seem to do just fine in their respective lifestyles.

Myself, being from the mainland have seen and put up with some minor harassment, but nothing I would consider threatening. For the most part I've become pretty good at telling people what they want to hear or otherwise catering to them somewhat. I've found that ignorant drunk people don't want to feel like you think they are stupid, or that your level of sophistication is better then theirs... even if it's true...

when a drunk idiot at a pub comes up and says "Hey Dracula Dude, whatcha doin'.." a response such as "Getting drunk and enjoying Friday" allows them to feel like you're doing the same thing they are, at their level. It usually garners a reaction such as "That's Cool.." or "Hell Ya" and defuses the situation... By ignoring them or brushing them off, gives them the impression you don't have time for them or otherwise don't think they are "worthy" of you... Ignoring them in this case often escalates their hostility... which is pretty much what their trying to do...

Alternatively, the main thing I've found, is to simply not be where idiots and assholes hang out or are otherwise not tolerated by management. Hotel Lounges and Pubs frequented by older adults are better for a conversation and don't have the same tolerance for stupid people. They'll be in your neighbourhood if you go looking.