i don't know if this counts as gothic, but i'm not sure what other catagory this would go under.

i'm 17 years old and i'm living in sydney australia, and i'm suffering from depression. It's recently gotten alot worse and instead of the occasional suicidal though...all i can think about is not wanting to put up with life any more and wanting to harm/ kill myself.

If there is anyone else in sydney that i can talk to, over the net or send e-mails or anything please contact me - i hate feeling like i'm the only one like this, and having to go through this alone.

i don't want to just talk to sympathisers, or those who have been through this but managed to get over it, i'm really hoping to talk to (preferably teenageers) who are going through this - one of the worst parts of my depression is the isolation is causes...if i could get inot contact with other sufferers perhaps the isolation would go away.

anyway, hoping to hear from anyone soon...

I think there are probably many goths, and I assume also enough normals that have to deal with, or have dealt with, depression. I had my own share of it through my late teens and around the 20 mark. No fun at all, and I can relate to feeling alone. I think the people that kept me going were friends I had online as I was quite isolated otherwise. Eventually I managed to change a few things in my life for the better, and other things entered my life giving me a new perspective and helping me deal with things.

First of all, and don't take this the wrong way, have you seen a doctor about this?

I've been trying to track down a recent thread which dealt with depression in a newsgroup, and to my annoyance I can't find it. The thread originated by someone's comment about being on anti-depressants, and many people chipped in with their experiences with various medications. Many mentioned pretty drastic positive results with being on the medication. The thread also would have served a purpose to illustrate that there are many people that deal with depression of some form or another and deal with it succesfully with medication.

I'd definitely recommend seeing a professional about this... especially considering you're considering hurting yourself. Sometimes depression has a way of sorting itself out, either completely or to a manageable state... sometimes you need help from the outside, because not everything can or should be dealt with on your own.

If you have access to newsgroups via your isp, there are a number of related groups that I found that you could probably lurk on or post to:
alt.support.depression
alt.support.depression.medication
there's loads more groups related in ways... manic depression, anxiety etc.

If your isp doesn't give you access to newsgroups, you can use Google Groups. Nowadays you can post through the Google Groups page as they're out of Beta mode, and you can also do searches in past topics on newsgroups for information or advice.

If you can connect to IRC it might be worth logging on to one of the major networks (DALnet or EFnet) and finding related channels to chat in?

Another option is Yahoo Groups, they have tons of mailing lists there, there's got to be a few that are dedicated to depression and teenagers with depression. You'll have to sign up for a Yahoo account to access the groups, but that's easily done (a search for "depression" brought up 973 results in the groups, so plenty of mailing lists).

But please consider seeing someone if you haven't already, it may make a world of difference.

Hope this helps,

Lilith

I hope you don't mind me repying to this Seether, because i'm not going through any stages of depression at the moment but i can understand where you are coming from. I would agree with Lilith though about maybe seeking some outside professional help, even if it's just to have someone to talk to.

I can relate to what you were saying about feeling isolated and going online is a great way to feel like you belong to a kind of 'community,' so keep sending posts and try to get as involved as you can in discussions. This way you won't feel as alone. If you want to talk about anything or just want a friend, you are welcome to e-mail or message me.

and they say goths don't care HA!

very rarely will you come across this amount of compassion anywhere and yet it thrives here

Deviant - LUV IT(firvilous[?])
P.s Seether has a cool name thing

Goths care about other goths, usually.

Darkness

Most Goths care about a great deal of things.

That they don't care is a phallacy, a stereotype.

Many Goths are politically aware, if not active. You can count high numbers of animal lovers/activists, vegetarians and vegans and people of alternative religions and lifestyles amongst Goths.

We're not ALL anti-social mopey fucks locked up in our bedroom. Well, not all the time anyway *grin*.

Lilith

i know where you're coming from, and u should probably see a doctor. I hope you haven't self-diagnosed yourself because that might be making it more than it really is. personally, i'm depressed allthe time, i just tend to distract myself although there's that feeling that it's eating away at you. people that i talk to tell me I need professionala help, but i hate doctors and do not believe in doctors or medicine. (my parents are doctors, oronic eh?! oh well i dislike them anyway) but if u believe in doctors, get help!! OR DISTRACT YOURSELF. it sounds stupid, but try it...stay busy the whole day and it'll lighten up. hopefully. good luck! if u need someone to talk to...
miagirl32@aol.com