You know you're goth if the only fish net you know about is the one that is on your arm.

You know you're Goth when people actually know what colour you're wearing, even if they don't see you for decades.

"I think I saw Carla at the post ofiice today."
"Was she wearing black?"
"Yes."
"Yeah, it was probably her."

Also, when people start to poke you just because you're wearing black during Summer.
And yes, all this happened to me.

You know you're goth when a fairly inebriated person tries to convert you at a drinking party in hopes of redeeming your oh so lost and damned soul, whilst knowing full well you're the only sober person on the premises!

You know you're a goth if people believe it when you sarcastically respond that you do sleep in a coffin.

You know you're a goth if you've had at least one relationship end because you jokingly suggested having sex in an abandoned hearse or in a wooded cemetery only to have the person you're with freak out and become unable to look at you again.

You know you're a goth if your boyfriend refuses to let you talk about a long list of topics simply because they're graphic enough to make him want to throw up.

You know you're a goth if your classmates in class decided to pool together money to try to buy you a tanning salon session... and then you know you're a goth if you look at them like they're crazy for doing so and say you'd rather die first (and meant it).

You know you're a goth if people you know keep telling you you're going to "turn goth" as if it is a developmental disorder.... and then you know you're a goth if you respond by arguing that their religious views indicate clinically severe mental illness that can be tangibly diagnosed using the DSM... and then encourage them to get treatment for "their developmental disorder." Related: you know you're a goth if you have a copy of the DSM that you keep by your phone for just this reason.

You know you're a goth when mechanics stop wanting to work on your car because of the music that comes on when they start it up.





(I've actually had all these happen).

You know you're goth if you find the DSM to be an intriguing and amusing read on more than just a clinical level...

All hail the DSM!!

You know youre goth if:
~You ate a happy meal... because you like to live dangerous
~when you moved into Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood, he moved away!
~You tried to be a hippie once and hugged a tree but it died.
~You fall asleep with your hands crossed on your chest.
~As a child you thought funeral processions were parades
~Bats hang little plastic verions of you on their ceiling
~When you were born the doctor asked you, "whats with the shades?"
~when you go outside the sunsets.
~Whenever you knock on someones door they give you candy
~You walk in a room and suddenly the lights go out.
(Those last two actually happened to me once...or twice.)

you are quite a fan of the works of jhonen, aren't you?

You know you're goth when you walk in the shadows in broad daylight and nobody sees you...

I just thought of that off the top of my head sorry if it's bad.

That happened to me twice so far. Have you been peaking into my windows?

-- Tue Jul 21, 2009 3:11 pm --

You know your goth when you cry black tears.

I don't wear that much eyeliner anymore.

When you're shopping for a house and rather than ask the square footage, you measure to see how many bats would fit in the attic
and you increase your offer if the inspector finds bodies buried underneath the foundation (hey, as long as nothing smells bad, it's all good).

(The inspection is scheduled for this Friday afternoon - keep a good thought for me, everybody)

That one happened to me recently.

You know you're goth when mothers hide their kids faces when you walk by.

Those are great, I had a good laugh. Annnyhow...

You know you´re goth when people call Bauhaus goth music and you quote Peter Murphy, saying ¨It´s not music, it´s art!¨

You know you´re goth when you learn to search through your clothing by feel and not by sight, since everything´s black.

You know you´re goth when you watch Hellraiser and get inspired to take notes on what you should wear tomorrow.

Who knows? that may have raised the property values in that community.

- Your favorite crayon in preschool was black
- You accidentally got tangled in your bondage pants
- When you go to a horror movie and people turn there heads they get startled because they think your the bad guy
- People get offended just by your prescence
- You had to go to the principles office in school because they thought that you were carrying a weapon.
- When you paint you just paint the whole page black
- Your friends or family suddenly start to worry about you
- When people are mine detecting they think they found something and say "Oh I think I found something" And you say "Thats me you idiot!"
- People start to think they're going color blind when they see you.
- When people see you on the tv they think its the 50's
- You accidently scratched yourself or someone else from your jewelry
- People start to think you stole police handcuffs or broke out of jail

You know you're Goth...when people that think they know what Goth is come up to you and say the first line from Poe's "the Raven" and whilst they're waiting for you to recite the whole thing you stab them to death with your antique absinthe spoon.