I'll start by stating that I am 40 and looking for work, and have a teenage son who is embarrassed by everything, so I have to live in what passes for the real world. Also going along with being 40, is that my skin is not what it used to be, and wrinkles are something that I have to deal with when I do my makeup, which truth be told, I don't often even bother with at all. And certain colors look ghastly on me, but not in a good way at all, so that completely rules out most blues and purples. Nowadays when a color makes me look pale, it just makes me look old, not lovely. (I'm sure we've all seen those aging goths who haven't figured out that the clothes and makeup that worked for them when they were 20 are no longer working now. I don't want to look like that.)

I've just had a baby, and my body looks like a deflated balloon. It's time for a fashion overhaul since nothing fits me anymore anyway, and losing weight just isn't done overnight. I feel kind of awful about how I look and my body in general, my pregnancy was really rough and my daughter was born early. My other daughter (middle child) has just hit that age where she has grown out of pink and frilly, and seems to be embracing a babygoth-leaning style. I thought, well here is something we can have fun with together.

I'm looking for creative input. I want to hide my pregnancy-ravaged belly till I can get it toned and a lot of weight off. I know ruching can help hide a saggy stomach while looking good. Is it possible to alter existing clothes, say an oversized tee, adding ruching, in a way that will look good on someone my age? Can anyone share successful projects with me?

What about working with colors other than black? The cooler hues look awful on me. I look great in dark or mossy green and chocolate brown. I lean towards a hippie-goth style, so I can get away with a little more earthy tones. I like flowing clothes, but don't want to look like I am wearing a circus sideshow tent. I have reached an age where I don't have time or energy for high-maintenance appearance, and I can't fight my changing body and skin anymore, I have to work with it. I also want to play up the thrifting and altering, not just for cost, but also to send my daughter the message that no matter what look she prefers, style is not something you buy, its something you create.

Pics please! Let me see your experiments that worked! Please share your dark, earthy genius!

Get an after-pregnancy tummy wrap. They are similar to the Belly Bands that give support to your poor belly when you are pregnant, and they are literally just used to help your tummy return to its previous shape.

I lost all the weight plus 20 lbs from having my son and I still can't get rid of my pouch, so I just work with it. So far my go to is to wear pants and skirts where the waist is flat and sits right at the center of my pouch so it is hidden. When I wear anything that doesn't sit right there, I wear undergarments that hold everything in like control top hose or undies.

~spidey

I'm gonna start by saying that I'm not going to pretend to "know" how you feel, I think coming from someone almost young enough to be your daughter maybe almost insulting to you. But I felt like I had some things to share when I read your post, so I hope you don't mind me putting in my two cents as it were.

First of all, I notice you said you "look great" in green and browns, and earthy colours. Sounds like you have a pretty good idea of what colours suit you, so stick to them If you feel great in them, you will look great and more confident too n_n It sounds like that hippy, earthy, tribally sort of thing is right up your alley, so explore them more. In a similar fashion, maybe looking at warmer colours (reds or autumnal colours for instance) would be more suiting to you than the cooler purples etc that you said don't look as flattering on you. And don't feel bad about that, everyone has a colour that looks better on them, or others that need to be toned down. Things like gypsy skirts (great for the summer btw) are quite low maintenance.

Taking care of yourself may make you feel pampered but also improve things you may not be happy with. Drink lots of water to keep hydrated, and enjoy a good diet and your skin will probably benefit. But also indulge yourself from time to time...you're a mum, you've worked hard, you had a hard pregnancy, why not treat yourself to a pampering night of bubble baths and facials etc? Don't take it too seriously, of course, but enjoy it. Also, another thing that will help all round (including that depressed feeling) is exercise.

People really hate it when I suggest that for depression/the blues/etc, but trust me, exercise releases endorphines and does help your mood

Cardio tends to be a good type for keeping fit and losing weight, but I would like to suggest belly-dancing to you. It seemed to me that you sound like an earth-mother type lady, so I think you would probably enjoy belly-dance (particularly Egyptian style as that is quite earthy and folkish). Its a low-intensive exercise and not one to take up with the expectation of getting a dream bod, but it does your body, loosen your joints and is generally makes you feel...better. Its also fun and you may enjoy dressing up for it, and feels less like a chore In fact, its something anyone of any age can do, so maybe you and your daughter might enjoy it together? Also, belly-dance favours a tummy it does engage your abdominal and hip muscles a lot, which will tone them, but the biggest stars always have a bit of a belly, I'm starting to become slightly fond of my pot-belly now!

I'm not sure if thats much help, but I just felt it might be worth sharing Best of luck!